We hit our first milestone of marriage this week. TEN, yes, I said ten years.
Wednesday night we went on a date and recounted oh-so-many memories. Year ten has connected us more than any other, I think. Through health issues, through ER visits, through ups, through downs-- sometimes I believe that challenges make us understand how much we really do need one another. There is no shoulder I'd rather lean on, there is no one I'd rather laugh with. This is a good place to be.
Our wedding- that pretty day in July 2005 when we believed we knew one another so thoroughly- we had only scratched the surface of knowing one another. We learned that first year what pushed buttons, and how to approach the serious conversations, and when to back off... and we learned through trial and error and pushing said buttons. One day- not too long after our wedding- I got so cranky with my brand new husband that I poured half of a cup of water from my bedside table on him... I am not proud to admit that, but it lead to the tricky predicament of him needing to scoot now CLOSER to me to avoid the wet spot I had made on his side of the bed... which ended in laughter, now becoming a fond distant memory.
You know how at bridal showers or sometimes at weddings, there are occasionally journals or notecards where you can offer your best advice to newlyweds? My advice is almost always this: do not take yourself too seriously. Laugh a LOT. When you're in the moment of "who is this crazy person I married and how can we possibly disagree so fervently," look in the mirror at your scowl and choose to laugh at yourself and at your stubborn moments. Choose to recognize that you are also flawed and choose forgive. Choose to discuss and move forward. Obviously easier said than done, but when it comes down to it- life will be much simpler for all if we both raise olive branches before things get too heated.
Look at me- some kind of authority on marriage only ten years in? I think not. But I do love being married to Brian and I do know that I will love him forever. :) Happy Ten to us!